I have a confession to make.
For the first few years of my current relationship (and honestly, in past ones too), there’s a part of me I would hide — simply because I thought it wasn’t acceptable in love: how much I actually eat, and how much I genuinely love food.
I’m being completely serious.
I feel a little ridiculous even writing this, but I’ve noticed the same tendency in many women who care about their appearance.
It took me years to feel truly comfortable eating the portions I wanted, or the food I craved, in front of my partner without feeling like he’d think I wasn’t “ladylike” enough for having such a healthy appetite.
And whenever that old insecurity creeps back in, I remember:
he’s French.
In his culture (well, in a few), the fact that a woman eats with pleasure is actually seen as a very good sign.
Which leads me to today’s reflection:
Do you tend to shine or shrink in the presence of love?
Do you stay rooted, grounded, and fully yourself?
Or do you feel the need to put on a mask, to play a character made of traits that aren’t really yours?
And most importantly (at least I believe so):
Can you remain fully feminine, sensual, or powerful in the presence of a partner, or do you tend to dim it?
Yes, good morning to you too.
I’ve been thinking a lot this year about the different aspects of intimacy in relationships.
And I can’t help but wonder how many people struggle with this.
We often talk about breakups as if they’re always about money, cheating, or growing apart — the obvious stuff.
But I think one of the real, subtle fractures in a relationship happens when we slowly stop showing up as ourselves.
Not because we don’t love the person, but because we’re afraid that our truest self might not be loved back.
That’s what intimacy challenges.
Not just physical closeness, but emotional nakedness. The bravery of staying open, messy, human,
especially when it would be easier to shut down, shrink, or perform.
My partner and I have been together for almost 10 years, and we both have a lot of water in our birth charts (which, astrologically speaking, means we’re quite emotionally intense). So whenever a vulnerable subject comes up, we’re both very involved.
We’re always trying to work through it — which is beautiful, but also exhausting.
Maybe it would be easier if we were more emotionally grounded. I don't know.
But here’s what I do know:
There is no better feeling in a relationship than the relief of being fully, unapologetically yourself in front of someone you love.
Love should feel like home.
Our partners should feel like home.
And since many of us share that physical home too — well, it’s all the more reason to want to be fully ourselves in our own sanctuary.